Most computer areas, at your home or at your office, tend to be messy. Even you try to keep it clean, it is truly impossible. Whether it be empty Coke cans laying all around, soldering devices, electric diodes, computer parts, or integrated circuits, it is not only a pain for your mother to look at, but a prime Russian ICBM missile target as well.

There is much detail needed to explain a Hacker. For instance, instead of organizing his clothes by color, best ones, or style, he organizes his by pile. Also, he likes to sing songs such as, “Let’s get Digital”, “We all live in a yellow subroutine”, and “Somewhere over the RAMbow”.

Most Hackers do well in school. The reason is not to impress their teachers, not to get money from their parents, and not to be educated, but they do it so they can hopefully get a scholarship to MIT. You can’t blame them, though, if they are looking out into space. It might be because they are worried if MCI traced the calls that they sent to NORAD.

All Hackers, big or small, love computers, whether they be Trash-80′s or an IBM 360/VM workstation. When they get on one, it’s mighty hard to get them off of it.

There are 2 types of Hackers. One who likes to crash local BBS’s, and the one who writes programs in Assembly Language. The Hacker who crashes systems is the one that most people think that a Hacker is. A typical example of one is John Fredrickson (A.K.A. “The Phone Man”). He loves to crash computers, and break into illegal systems. The ones that he has gotten in to are MCI, CitiBank, school systems, IBM, Southern Bell, and Georgia Tech, not to mention all the ones in between.

The second type of Hacker is the programmer. He writes games, utilities, and anything else that he can think of. Take for example, John Harris, a freelance software writer for On-Line Software Co. John had a brainstorm one day, and decided to write Frogger for the Apple. He thought that it would take about 3 weeks to complete. He started on Frogger a week late, because of the complicated music set that he had to write. After two months, he was almost done. He decided to take a break and go to the Software Expo. He decided to take his nearly completed Frogger, and show it to the consumers at the show. He also took with him the only back-up copy, in case the main disk did not boot.

While at the fair, he was talking to the Manager about getting a booth. He had his disks with him. Then, when he got a booth reserved, he reached down to get his disks, and they were gone! All his hard work, including the MultiLevel character generator, music lines, disk subroutines, assembly routines, debugging programs, etc. All gone.

After that tragedy, John was in a deep depression. He finally started working on it again in 3 months. He completed it in 4 months and 3 days.

Part Two:

Hackers always take time off. There is always one way to notice a true Hacker. At a party, the true Hacker is the one in the corner talking about operating system security and how to get around it. At the beach, the True Hacker is the one drawing flow charts in the sand. At a football game, the true Hacker is the one comparing the football plays against a simulation printed on 11 by 14 fanfold paper.

Most Hackers work for the U.S. Government– mainly the Department of Defense. You can see the best Hackers at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory in California.

What sort of environment does a Hacker function best in? No, not a heated room with a clean table and disks organized neatly, but they do best in rooms that have line-printed Snoopy calendars from the year 1969. They do not know how to cook, so they survive on Twinkies and coffee. Instead of wasting electricity for a heater, they spend it on air-conditioners to cool of their computer system in mid-January when the temperatures are below freezing. They wear layers and layers of clothing to keep the body heat in. When you see one of these people, instead of a Hacker coming into your mind, you think that he is about to go on a Polar expedition somewhere in the North Pole.

Hackers also like to hang around arcades. (This is also true for kids, little old ladies, and fighter pilots.) There, secluded in their

own environment, Hackers can talk freely on computer hints and short cuts while playing Pac-Man, or Joust.

All Hackers like Graphics. They like low-resolution, but prefer high-resolution the best. These graphics, such as Sine waves, rotating 3-D boxes, and little balloons, are confined to the limits of a systems capability. The older more experienced Hackers are the ones who are lucky enough to get to work on a VAX system, and maybe even a CRAY-1 SuperComputer. If they use these, they have only the limits of their imagination to stop them.

Most Middle School Hackers between the ages of 10 through 14, like to use computers to do reports on, and play games. Some of these younger generation Hackers have gotten into BASIC programming.

Some people, like to impress real Hackers by making them think that they know everything. There is a name for this kind of person. He is a Sub-Hacker (Intillectuous dumbfoundeth). For instance, you come up to them one day, and say,”Hey so-and-so what does BASIC stand for?” and you could sit there for days, and he would act like the answer was on the tip of his tongue, when it was probably in his toes. It is people like this that give Hackers a bad name.

Part Three:

All Hackers have rules that they go by. One is to never call long distance on Monday, because of the high phone charge. If builders built buildings they way programmers wrote programs, the first woodpecker that comes along would destroy civilization. Another is, if the computer accepts a program on the first run without any errors, either there is a malfunction, or it must be a dream.

Hackers are a unique breed. Combining intelligence, personality, and a morale sense of good taste. A Hacker enjoys the environment that appeals to him the most. Such as, the computer room, the arcade, science lab, or the Atari downstairs. They like to be alone. Secluded in their own thoughts, thinking of what the password could be to log on to General Electric. Hackers are the people who are going to make our future brighter, and more exciting in the field of electronics, data processing, artificial intelligence, and programming. We need to support these people in all the ways that we can, so we will be insured of a more happier future in the world of technological advancements.

hahahaha=))

I hope you all entertained…

Ghost Shit
You know you’ve shit. There’s shit on the toilet paper, but no shit in the bowl.
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Teflon Coated Shit
Comes out so slick, clean and easy that you don’t feel it. No traces of shit on the toilet paper, you have to look in the bowl to be sure you did it!
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Gooey Shit
This has the consistency of hot tar. You wipe your ass 12 times and it still doesn’t come clean. You end up putting toilet paper in your underwear so you don’t stain it. This shit leaves permanent skid marks in the toilet.
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Second Thought Shit
You’re all done wiping your ass and you’re about to stand up when you realize it…..you’ve got some more.
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Pop a Vein in Your Forehead Shit
This kind is the kind of shit that killed Elvis. It doesn’t come until you’re all sweaty, trembling and purple from straining so hard.
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Bali Belly Shit
You shit so much you lose 5 kilos.
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Right Now Shit
You better be within 10 seconds of a toilet. Usually it has its head out before you get your pants down.
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King Kong or Commode Choker Shit
This shit is so big that you know it won’t go down the toilet unless you break it into smaller chunks. A coat hanger works well. This kind of shit usually happens at someone else’s house.
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Wet Cheeks Shit
This shit hits the water sideways and makes a BIG splash that gets your ass wet.
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Wish Shit
You sit there all cramped up and fart a few times, but no shit!
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Cement Block or Oh God Shit
You wish you’d gotten a spinal block before you shit.
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Snake Shit
This shit is fairly soft and about as big around as your thumb and at least three feet long.
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Cork Shit (Also Known as Floater Shit)
Even after the third flush, it’s still floating in there. My god! How do I get rid of it? This shit usually happens at someone else’s house.
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Mexican Food Shit (also called Screamers)
You’ll know it’s alright to eat again when your asshole stops burning.
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Beer Drunk Shit
This happens the day after the night before. Normally your shit doesn’t smell too bad, but this shit is BAD. Usually there’s somebody standing outside to use the bathroom. This kind of shit also usually happens at someone else’s house.
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The Frightened Turtle
The kind of shit that just pokes its head out then quickly goes back in
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The Bungee Shit
The kind of shit that just hangs off your ass before it falls into the water.
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The Ring of Fire Shit
The kind of shit where you eat really spicy food and your asshole feels like the inside of a cigarette lighter.
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The Crippler
The kind of shit where you have to sit on the toilet so long your legs go numb from the waist down.
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The Big Bobber
The kind of shit that no matter how many times you flush it always floats back to the surface.
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The Shitty Shitty Bang Bang
The kind of shit that hits you when you’re trapped in your car in a traffic jam.
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The Jack the Ripper Shit
The kind of shit that yanks out the hair of your ass as it pushes its way out.
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The Party Pooper
The giant shit you take at a party. And when you flush the toilet, you watch in horror as the water starts to rise.
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Dirty Bowl Shit
The kind of shit that comes out in a million pieces a second, reminiscent of an avalanche – but with rocket propulsion, and splatters all over the toilet bowl.
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The Windy City Shit
When you sit down, and fart for so long and hard that you no longer need to take a shit.
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Oh Shit! Shit
You shit so much and wipe your ass so furiously you run out of toilet paper and you say OH SHIT!
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The Never Ending Shit
It’s the shit that keeps running out of your ass like pea, and just when you start wiping your ass your stomach gargles and splash, more shit runs out. This always happens after eating at Kentucky Fried Chicken.
—————————————–
Ouch That Hurt Shit
The type of shit that leaves you feeling like you just hoped onto a bicycle without a seat. Sensation usually lasts hours.

A. The Dallas Cowboys

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3 Chinese friends, Bu, Cu and Fu went to America. They decided to americanize their names.

Bu became Buck, Cu became Chuck and Fu went back to China.

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Q: What do poker and sex have in common?

A: If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

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Q. Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs?

A. Because he doesn’t want anyone to know he’s screwing a chicken.

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Q. Why couldn’t the blonde add 10 and 7 on a calulator?

A. She couldn’t find the 10 key.

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Q: How do you know when a man’s planning for the future?

A: He buys TWO cases of beer.

A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

All Polar bears are left-handed.

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.

Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without knee caps. They don’t appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

Cat’s urine glows under a black light.

China has more English speakers than the United States.

Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn’t wear pants.

Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall and have a neck twice the length of a normal human’s neck.

If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

Marilyn Monroe had six toes.

Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.

No word in the English language rhymes with month.

On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.

One of the reasons marijuana is illegal today is because cotton growers in the ’30s lobbied against hemp farmers, they saw it as competition.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

Starfish haven’t got brains.

Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

The average human eats eight spiders in their lifetime at night.

The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off.

The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

The name Wendy was made up for the book “Peter Pan.”

The Pentagon, in Arlington, Virginia, has twice as many bathrooms as is necessary. When it was built in the 1940s, the state of Virginia still had segregation laws requiring separate toilet facilities for blacks and whites.

The sentence, “The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog” uses every letter in the English language.

The shortest war in history was between Zanzibar and England in 1896. Zanzibar surrendered after 38 minutes.

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

The word “lethologica” describes the state of not being able to remember the word you want.

There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters on only one row of the keyboard.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

You are more likely to be killed by a Champagne cork than by a poisonous spider.

You can’t kill yourself by holding your breath.

You share your birthday with at least nine million other people in the world.

“When your dad is mad and asks you, “Do I look stupid?’
Don’t answer.”
– Hannah, age 9

Never tell your Mom her diet’s not working.”
– Michael, age 14

“Stay away from prunes.”
– Randy, age 9

“Don’t pull Dad’s finger when he tells you to.”
– Emily, age 10

“When your Mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.”
– Taylia, age 11

“Never let your three-year old brother in the same room as your school assignment.”
– Traci, age 14

“A puppy always has bad breath–even after eating a Tic-Tac.”
– Andrew, age 9

“Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.”
– Kyoyo, age 11

“You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.”
– Amir, age 9

“Don’t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.”
– Kellie, age 11

“If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.”
– Naomi, age 15

“Felt-tip markers are not good to use as lipstick.”
– Lauren, age 9

“Don’t pick on your sister when she’s holding a baseball bat.”
– Joel, age 10

“When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your Mom when she’s on the phone.”
– Alyesha, age 13

“Never try to baptize a cat.”
– Eileen, age 8

Well, sa tingin ko nawawala na ako sa sarili ko, hindi ko na minsan alam ang ginagawa ko. Minsan nautusan ako na maghain na para sa aming hapunan biruin mo pumunta ako sa c.r. at ayon, anu pa ba ang kasunod; naghanap ako ng pinggan sa comfort room. Ang laki kung tanga.

Sa tingin ko kaya ako nagkakaganito ay dahil sa maraming dahilan, isa-isahin ko para sa inyo.

1. walang pasok
2. walang magawa
3. nasobrohan sa pagiging tahimik
4. nababaliw?
5. adik sa pag co-computer

at ang pinakahuli na sa tingin ko ay ang dahilan kung bakit ako nagkakaganito ay,

6. in-love kay _? (god, sana walang magtanong)

………………………………………………………………………………………..

Gusto ko ng pumasok para masubukan ang bago kung natutunan na hindi pa naman napag-aaralan. Ang hirap na kasi ng mga bago naming topic ngayon, akala ko kasi sa umpisa lang yung ‘sisiw’ hindi pala naging ‘manok’ na siya. hay… sana huwag umabot na maging ‘tandang na manok’ pa siya, siguradong mababaliw ako lalo.

Teka..teka.. huwag ka sanang matakot sa akin, medyo matino pa ako at nakaka-recover na.

Mag-aral, mag-aral at mag-aral habang may panahon pa at kaya ka pang pag-aralin ng iyong mga magulang. Mahirap mabuhay ng walang pinag-aralan.

Ano kayang susunod na mangyayari sa akin?

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return”

ang sa akin naman…

“Love is just a game that you have to win to get what you want but if that love is crucial and you know that it wouldn’t go any much further then you better hide it inside”

Ang pag-ibig nga naman, pag ikaw ay tinamaan siguradong hindi ka titigil hanggat hindi mo nasasabi ang iyong nararamdaman kung hindi naman hihintayin munang masaktan.

Sa panahon ngayon madali na lang daw makakuha ng makakasama, pero hindi ako naniniwala dyan ang alam ko kasi ang pinapairal ng mga tao ngayon ay ang kanilang isipan kahit na labag sa kanilang nararamdaman.

Ang tao ay biniyayaan ng diyos ng napakarami at pambihirang katangian ngunit isa sa mga katangiang iyon ay ang katangiang ‘magmahal’

Meron pa bang naniniwala sa true love?

hayy…napag iwanan na yata ako ng panahon. Sana hindi pa huli ang lahat bago ko pa masabi ang aking nararamdaman ayoko ng madama muli ang pakiramdam ng pagkabigo at kalungkutan, sawang-sawa na ako.

I’ll tell her…